Erling Haaland's girlfriend celebrates Norway's World Cup run, Biles claps back & Swift-Kelce wedding snubs

Well, good news, everybody. We can stop pretending to like soccer.

Actually no, I take that back. Even though the USA got brutally bounced by Belgium last night, please make sure to continue watching the World Cup tournament in its entirety on FOX.

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No one will accuse me of not being a team player. A proud company woman.

In all seriousness, though, that was a bummer of a game. And I actually had to make a special trip to a bar to see it. Spent money just to watch us get our butts handed to us by the Belgians.

See, we had some gnarly thunderstorms over the weekend, and one of them completely fried my WiFi. No internet. Done. Kaput.

Not ideal when you work from home. Less ideal when you have YouTube TV. And even less ideal than that on a holiday weekend when it's impossible to get someone out to fix it.

I had to watch Joey Chestnut eat 66 hot dogs on my tiny phone screen. Like the pioneers did in the olden days.

Anyway, we're back baby. The AT&T guy fixed us up this afternoon — just in time to get you your Tuesday Nightcaps.

So take a load off and crack open an ice cold domestic. Let's roll.

For a few reasons. The first one is that I think their whole rowing schtick is cool.

The second reason is that I love the idea of these horned-helmeted fellas from the freezing cold fjords coming down here and beating the perennial soccer powerhouses of South America and Western Europe. Feels like an underdog story.

I don't know enough about soccer to tell you if it actually is an underdog story.

And the No. 1 reason I'm rooting for Norway from here on out is that Erling Haaland seems like a real hoot.

Another foreigner falling in love with American tradition. We love to see it.

Speaking of Haaland, his girlfriend, Isabel Haugseng Johansen, is living her best life during Norway's tournament run. And she, like Erling, is embracing her cowgirl era.

"Galskap" means "madness," by the way. And now that I think of it, that's the first Norwegian word I've ever learned. They didn't offer that as an option in high school.

The wedding of the century is finally over. Not that you would know it, considering all of social media and every other headline in the New York Post is about Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's Madison Square Garden nuptials — who went, who didn't, what may or may not have happened, what everyone wore, who caught the bouquet.

The answer is Trey Smith's sister, Ashley, by the way.

Tay-Tay's bouquet, she said. My goodness.

Anyway, one of the other 4 gazillion people who attended the wedding was none other than Simone Biles. And her lesser-known husband, NFL safety Jonathan Owens.

And by the looks of it, they had a whole professional photo shoot on their way to the event. Sorry, "evenTT."

You know what? I don't even blame them. If I spent the thousands of dollars Simone undoubtedly spent on that look, I'd want it documented, too. Since apparently no one was allowed to take photos inside MSG.

Except, of course, the professional camera crew filming Travis and Taylor's wedding documentary — coming to a theater near you Spring 2027!

Actually, I made that up. But mark my words, it will happen. Taylor is nothing if not a stone-cold capitalist. You've got to respect it.

Anyway, upon revelation that Simone attended the wedding, one of her fans commented, "When has Simone Biles and Taylor Swift even spoken to each other? 😂"

Biles swiftly (see what I did there?) responded: "remember this, I only show y’all what I want y’all to know."

Well OK then!

Is it just me or Simone one of those people who takes every little comment as a highly personal attack?

I don't know if she and Taylor Swift are friends. I don't particularly care either way. But I'd be lying if I said that I didn't have that exact thought (i.e. - "How on earth is that person even remotely connected to Taylor and Travis?") at least 100 times since seeing some of the people on the guest list.

My friend (and elite Fox broadcaster) Kevin Burkhardt even got an invite along with... Dean Blandino?! No offense to those dudes, but that one was a shocker to see on my Instagram feed.

Couldn't get KB to give me the deets, either. NDA must have been ironclad.

I know, I know. Who am I to say that Taylor and Travis don't have 1,000+ close personal friends? But it really does seem like they just invited a who's who of celebrities and sports industry royalty, regardless of their actual affiliation to the couple. A status symbol wedding.

Which means if you didn't get an invite, you really are a nobody. Like me, Taylor Lewan and Will Compton.

That's right, the hosts of "Bussin' with the Boys" did not get invited to the Swift-Kelce wedding. And I was certainly surprised by this one. Compton — a Tight End U guy — said he was "flabbergasted" by the snub and took it as a personal shot.

And I kind of agree. How did Trey Smith's sister get an invite and Will Compton didn't?

Lewan also took it personally and let loose a bit of a scathing rant on the show this morning.

"So what you’re telling me is I’m not top 9,500 in Travis’ life?" Lewan asked. "He doesn’t have 9,500 [people] in his phone."

Valid points are being made here. Except I think it was 1,000 people, not 10,000 people.

Still.

Under normal people wedding circumstances, I'd say it's childish to get your knickers in a twist about who get's an invite. After all, normal people have to stick to budgets and space constraints.

Having planned my own wedding, I know that all too well.

But we're not talking about normal people pinching pennies here. We're talking about kajillionaire celebrities tying the knot in a basketball arena.

You mean to tell me close personal friends Taylor Lewan and Will Compton had to stay home while Kristin Cavallari and the Chainsmokers were enjoying lobster and an open bar?

Cold, man.

It's been a while since I've given a shameless plug for OutKick Outdoors, so let's do that now.

FORREST GALANTE SAYS MOST SHARK BITES ARE A CASE OF MISTAKEN IDENTITY AS FLORIDA ATTACKS LEAD THE US

Recently I had the opportunity to interview Forrest Galante, a wildlife expert, biologist and TV host on Discovery. He has a new "Shark Week" special coming up later this month, so we talked about everything from how not to lose a limb while swimming in the ocean to glow-in-the-dark sharks and his craziest near-death experiences in the wild.

Watch the interview here:

If you like hunting, fishing, hiking, camping, kayaking, boating or simply drinking beers on patios, give OutKick Outdoors a follow on Instagram and subscribe to the YouTube channel.

I'll appreciate you SO much. Way more than Travis Kelce appreciates Taylor Lewan and Will Compton.

Let's open the mailbag.

📩 Email: amber.harding@outkick.com (Send your thoughts, stories, tips, rants and photos of your dog.)

🐦 Twitter/X: @TheAmberHarding

📸 Instagram: @amberharding

Another reason you should be following OutKick Outdoors is for my killer travel reviews. Last summer, I wrote about the Apostle Islands along Wisconsin's North Shore.

READ: YOU DON'T NEED A KAYAK TO APPRECIATE NORTHERN WISCONSIN'S APOSTLE ISLANDS

Terry in North Texas Writes: I wanted to let you know that we made the trip to Madeline Island three weeks ago based upon your outdoor article many months ago. Thank you for that look into such a beautiful area that it met and exceeded expectations. The entire Northern WI area is beautiful and amazingly lightly populated. I have been on several ferries over my time, but I do have to say this was the first ride where I look in my rearview mirror and see a fully loaded 80,000 pound concrete ready mix truck driving onto the ferry. It makes you start wondering where those life jackets are and how cold is that water.

Amber:

So happy you loved it, Terry! That whole area along Lake Superior — Wisconsin and the UP — is so stunning and underrated.

Next week, my husband and I (and our dog) will be making our annual pilgrimage up North to visit his mom in Minocqua, Wisconsin. For the past couple of years, we've also taken a few days to drive up to Superior and do some hiking and adventuring. We've visited the Apostle Islands and the Porcupine Mountains so far.

This year, we plan to explore Minnesota's North Shore — staying around Tufte. If anyone reading has some great local recommendations for a dog-friendly, outdoorsy trip, send me an email!

OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m.